Oxymoron: Russian Children's Rights

This probably isn't the best time for me to blog because I'm stuck somewhere between anger and sorrow. You see, I have been given the gift of this beautiful little girl as my daughter, and as much as I rejoice in that, it brings me great sorrow to know there are children who will likely never be with forever families. Some of these kids, I have met, played with, loved on.

Igor

Katya

Vika

Sasha

Alyosha

You are not forgotten!

You may not mean anything to your government, but you do to me, and to Polina. We talk about you. We name dolls after you. I cry for you in private.

You are not forgotten!

And then there's the children on the list of approximately 250 that was provided for the Russian Children's Rights Ombudsman Pavel Astakhov. What an oxymoron that is. Russian Children's Rights??? The only children in Russia that have rights are those of the privileged, like Mr. Astakhov himself. But then again, his kids and wife live in France because Russia isn't good enough for them...oxymoron.

Speaking of moron....well....I'll just let you fill that in yourself.

Back on-topic.

Astakhov has said that no children will leave to America, not even those that have been introduced to American couples as their parents and been told they are coming to take them home. Those kids don't care where their families live, just that they have families. Well, they *had* families until the Russian government took them away. Now those children feel abandoned by two families. Apparently the Russian government either doesn't understand what that does to these children, or they don't care.

I go for the latter. You see, this really is not about the kids. It's about politics. God forbid Russia let these children go home to their families at the risk of appearing weak.

No Russian government, you don't look weak. In fact, you have shown the work how wicked, evil, viscous you choose to be.

Half of these children have been returned to their biological families or placed in foster homes you say. FANTASTIC. Only, correct me if I misunderstand, but you already revoked the rights of the biological family or these children never would have been available for adoption to begin with. And what about the other half. And what about the kids who aren't on the list? Do you have hundreds of thousands of homes to place these kids into? And what about the kids who need medical care they won't get there, like my Polina. What about them? What about

Igor

Katya

Vika

Sasha

Alyosha

What about them?

You don't care. They don't matter. That must be the case because there is no other reason you would be causing the emotional pain you are putting these kids through by keeping them from their families. You would be willing to find a solution to let your children find homes and healthcare they need. You wouldn't leave them in your neglectful and abusive orphanages as recently demonstrated through videos and deaths.

There's simply no other explanation than you don't care and they don't matter to you.

Where there's a will...

Anybody who knows Polina knows that there is no lack of will in this girl. In fact, she's the strongest willed little woman I know. When she puts her mind to something, there's no stopping her!

Today, we went to get her new KAFO's (knee, ankle, foot orthotics) and as soon as she saw them, she said, "I'm gonna walk!" As the doc tried to fit them, trim them, and make adjustments, Polina just kept telling him she was going to walk. He was so patient and so kind. By the end of the appointment, I was fighting back tears...so if you're a big Polina fan...get your tissues NOW!

I love how she asks for gum - a true sign of where she came from!

Now, don't forget that Polina still needs surgical correction to her right foot and both legs. Her foot surgery is scheduled for August 1st. For now, the lucky girl got a new pair of shoes with a wedge in the right foot to help even her out for weight bearing. In the picture below, you can see how the right shoe in front is lifted at the sole.

And, if you've been following our story, you know that Polina's legs have both been broken. The left one is healed incorrectly and the right one still appears to be broken. None of the doctors or therapists have seen anything like it. Here is a picture of the Xray.

 

 

You can try to imagine how I felt when the doctor showed me this. I was angry! I don't know how it could have happened and been undiscovered. She wouldn't have felt it, but I can't imagine it didn't bruise and swell like crazy. Whatever the case may be, it just goes to show that orphans need parents who are able to pay attention to them and the changes and needs within their bodies. Blaming doesn't do any good, it is what it is, and now it's time to move on and fix it.

 

I do have a theory as to how it happened. In fact, when the doctor showed me, my gut immediately told me what happened. Polina had braces similar to the ones she got today in Russia. There is a big difference in how they work in the knee. I attempt to show you that in this next video.

 

 

 

What I believe happened to Polina's leg is that a well-meaning, but untrained caregiver attempted to put her into her brace and pushed her knee too hard (probably after casting causing her bones to be weaker) and the bones just snapped. I am thankful for the health care that Polina received in Russia. It is better than she would have gotten in a lot of places and she was lucky enough to be sponsored to receive care. I am especially thankful for those people. However, I'm even more thankful for the advancements and care available to her here in the US!

 

The following pictures are of her showing off her new hardware and standing with something to help her balance.

 

 

What an amazing day!

Russian TV & Big News

First, the BIG news everyone has been asking about.

Polina will have surgery on her right foot on August 1st. We are so blessed to have decided to get a second opinion and found Dr. Sinclair at Mercy Children's of Kansas City! He will remove the ankle bone from Polina's foot as it rests on top of her foot rather than to the side. This surgery will make it so that her foot will no longer slant and will make an L-shape. This will allow her to keep shoes on her feet (WOO HOO!) but more importantly, it will allow her to attempt to stand on her feet following the next surgery to fix her broken legs. Hopefully that surgery will take place before the end of the year.

It is still unknown rather Polina will be able to walk or not. It is going to depend on how strong her thighs are, and we won't know until after these surgeries are completed and we start trying. One thing everyone knows is that this girl has got the WILL! She wants to walk and she does what she puts her mind to!

In other news, Russian TV send a camera man to meet us on our last trip to KC. Below is a link to their story. It's around 11 minutes long and it's all in Russian. Even if you can't understand Russian, I encourage you to watch, look at these children, and let your heart be broken for what breaks His. Put your life in perspective, and find a way to help families that are adopting children from similar situations, rather it be through financial, spiritual, or emotional support.

http://tvrain.ru/articles/Po_tu_storonu_zakona_kak_zhivut_pervie_zhertvi_zakona_podlecov-345874/

Dear Mr. Astakhov

Dear Mr. Astakhov,

Since you said that Russia would "take care of their own," a video showing great physical abuse in one of your orphanages has surfaced, it was discovered that your doctors never discovered my daughter's two drastically broken legs, and now a child whose parents you blocked from bringing them home has died because, again, your system failed to detect a major medical condition. Is the location of this child's burial being hidden because of your innocence? How does it feel to have the death of innocent children on your conscience? Or do you have a conscience at all sir? 

Overdue Update

I know it's been a long time since I've blogged. In some sense, I apologize. In another, I've been spending my time with my precious family as we work to help Polina adapt to life in a family. I won't lie - it hasn't been the easiest, smoothest transition. I debate over what I share here. It may not be for awhile until I share, and it may be in the form of a book rather than on my blog. I think it's important for people to know the not-so-glorious details of what institutionalized life does to children. At the same time, my daughter deserves some level of privacy and then there's the fact that we are still under the Russian government's radar.

All that being said, Polina Joy is thriving! She is going to a regular school and spends her days with peers who are not handicapped in any way. We run into classmates in public and she gets terribly excited. We had a princess party for her 6th birthday. She plays Miracle League baseball, goes to 2 hours each of physical and occupational therapy in addition to what she gets at school. She absolutely loves animals and I need to start a therapy dog fund for her. She has ridden horses a few times. She loves her older brother and is very protective of him. They fight like typical siblings. From the outside looking in, you would never know Polina isn't our biological child. So many people say she looks just like me. That makes me feel good because she is the most beautiful little girl!

Anyhow, I took a video today that inspired me to update you. Polina has been measured for a custom wheelchair, a stander and orthotic braces that will go from her hips to her feet. It is going to take a few months before all of these things are ready. However, Polina isn't waiting. Today, she told me, "Watch this."  She proceeded to push herself up with her arms until her feet were lat on the ground & she was "standing" bent over holing onto a bucket. I wish I could get the video to work for you to see.

Instead, here's a bunch of photos of life as a Russian orphan adopted into an American family. 

Getting sized for wheelchair/stander

A Day in Polina's Life

The following link is a video of a day in the life of Polina. Radio Free Europe asked me to put together photos and videos of one day in her life. In an effort to keep it as pure as possible, I did this project the very next day.

Radio Free Europe Link 

I am thankful for them doing this. With the recent death of another Russian born child adopted into America, I think it is important for the Russian people to see what the lives of most children adopted in America is like. There is always going to be an exception - to everything, no matter where you go. However, most of the people around the world who adopt children love and care for them on a daily basis as I hope this video shows me doing with Polina. The cases of the now 20 children who have died after being adopted by American parents from Russian are all tragedies. I don't know the details of every case. What I do know are the details of many families I am friends with in person and through social media who love their children very much just like we do Polina. They take them to therapies, to parks, to church and to play dates with friends. We fight for the rights of our children here in America so that they can have the best life with the most possibilities - the very reason we brought them here. I hope that when Russians think of American families that adopt children, they realize that 99.97% of the 60,000 children adopted into American homes are healthy and doing well. 

I'm very saddened by the case of Max Shatto. I trust that the justice system will find the truth in the case and that Max's younger brother, also adopted from Russia, is in the safe care of those who are not under investigation in this suspicious case. I can not blame the Russian officials for wanting to follow this case and be involved - we would want the same as Americans. I don't know if Max Shatto was abused and I pray that he was not. I do not know the details of that case and leave it to our justice system to find the truth.

Child abuse is not unique to one country and has many different forms. If we are all honest with each other, we will admit that children all over the world are abused daily. Some of those are in American families, rather by birth or adoption. Some of those are in orphanages in other countries. Some of them are living on the streets in all different countries of the world, including the USA. World leaders need not to point fingers at each other, or say that one of us is better than the others. We need to love and care for ALL children and stop ignoring the fact that this does, in fact, happen in our own back yards. Children are a gift from God and are to be valued. It is my prayer that world leaders will put the welfare of children above all else and work together to find solutions to this epidemic. Please join me in that prayer!

Thursday - Bonding and Farewells

We had to wait for our final paperwork to come on Thursday, and we were exhausted from the past two days, so we spend the day inside bonding while waiting for paperwork and visitors in the afternoon/evening.

I taught Polina how to tickle her Papa. This was loads of fun. He is very ticklish!

He couldn't take it anymore - so he gave in to request to "go up!"

After they tired of that, it was time to "walk" around the house in her warm, comfy Russian boots!

After nap, we changed Polina and "Princessa Katya's" clothes and put on their matching coats.

And then our first guest arrived. Unfortunately, I am not able to post pictures with her. She helped Polina and she wants to be able to help other kiddos. So for the sake of those kiddos, she must remain anonymous. Sad. True. This woman was my sanity during the whole process of the adoption. But more than that, she was someone stable for my princess over the years and through the transition from the baby house to the orphanage. I cried when she left. I cried uncontrollably. I love this woman and will always be indebted to her. Without her, we wouldn't have Polina and Polina wouldn't be who she is!

This picture shows Polina opening gifts from afore mentioned woman.

Our next visitors were our facilitators. On the left is Alyona. We worked mostly with her. She did our translations, took us to court, etc. However, during this very busy week in Russia when American families were trying to get court information in prior to Feb. 1, she was busy with translations and representations. So, Katya stepped in to help. Katya took us to the passport office and the embassy and took care of our consulate paperwork. We are so thankful for both of them. They continue to work tirelessly for the children and families that were in the process. In addition, Alyona asked me about my interest in helping them start a program in the future for the special needs kids who would not find homes in Russia. They don't stop with our kiddos coming home. These are the faces of two Russian women who care for these children!

The light Alyona brought for Polina was a great hit!